Memorial Day. Resting up after a very hectic and busy week-end in the heat at Wichita Kansas State University 2023 Track and Field Meet which started on Friday morning.
I want to rest up before posting pics. My strength is low and my gut is hurting. On Friday afternoon, we had time to go to COW TOWN to take a look at some houses after we saw the events our Granddaughter was in. Our afternoon and evening were freed up.
Thursday, we headed out for the State Meet staying in Park City. Didn't sleep well and ran on fumes throughout the day, Friday. Was at the Track at 6:20 AM. Found a great place to sit on the bleachers. Wore my wide rim hat cheering for the runners. Especially Lil Miss. More events on Saturday and we did our best to sit in the shade down by the Shot Put Competition where we could see the track.
Spent the whole day there only going to the bathroom three times in which the walk was truly a haul to get to. Around three in the afternoon I walked back to my car to sit in air conditioning for about twenty minutes resting in the shade and feeling some cool air blowing on me then walked the long distance back to see more events. I walked extremely slow and thought I wasn't going to make it back. BUT I did and I sat the rest of the time in a lawn chair holding my umbrella and wearing a hat sipping fluids.
We left after our Granddaughter finished her last event late Saturday. She did well. On Friday, she placed 2nd in the 3200m and first in the 400 elimination race. Afternoon off. Saturday, she placed 2nd in the 1600m and 400m then in the 800m she placed third place. Altogether she ran 5 races in two days. WELL DONE. A great accomplishment for a young athlete. SO thankful we were able to be there in person to see the victories.
Many talented athletes to watch in the heat and sunshine. NO RAIN. Sometimes a cool breeze.
On Saturday, we went onto my Mom's and spent the night. As we arrived at her place, I was beyond tired and said this is a mistake. We should have stayed one more night at Park City and rested before driving even to my Mom's. Made it through the night and slept well, but being around my Mom requires energy that I just didn't have. So tired. Was sweet to see her and visit with her.
Decorated my Father's and brother's graves Sunday with my Mom and Husband. Returned HOME and rested for the rest of the day. I am overly tired.
My Mom gets very upset visiting the cemetery and I believe this is why her blood pressure raises to an unsafe number. She had gone to the emergency room on Friday. She told us about it. Then when we tried to reach her to let her know we were HOME on Sunday, her landline and cellphone just rang. Tried five times to reach her with no answer.
Finally, my Husband suggested calling the ER to see if she was there and she was. Once again her blood pressure was too high. She stayed awhile then returned to her HOME, took some medicine and was told to go see the doctor in the morning. I believe her blood pressure raises due to being so upset. Not sure how the medical staff will treat her for a broken heart.
She doesn't seem to be any better knowing Dad isn't coming back and is in heaven, a much better place than earth. Dad died 6 and a half years ago. She told us with him being gone it has taken all the joy out of her life. I understand her grieving and loneliness, but I believe she needs to focus on the good times they shared and thank God that she had a loving Husband and companion as long as she did. Acknowledging the blessings of still having three living children with spouses and families, grandchildren and great grandchildren should mean something. She's stuck in a rut and I believe that is where she will stay until she passes away. Her sweetheart is gone.
I told her that I did not believe God wanted her to not enjoy life and she needs to find enjoyment in other things. She needs to look for things that will bring her joy. Enjoy the family she still has that are still alive. If she stays in the dumps with no joy, she will get sick. I know it is easier said than done. Still. She doesn't want to move on. Is she contented to stay in the rut?
Moving her to an apartment in our small town wouldn't be near a Hospital or pharmacy and she would not have any social life with known peers with a community center that has weekly and monthly activities. I think she needs to relocate to the nursing home in her hometown where she would be near medical attention, prepared meals, and friendships with friends she has had for a few decades. If we relocate her to an apartment and she continues to go downhill at 91, we will have to be the ones to tend to her at all times and she probably would have to go into a nursing home anyways. How many moves would this take? Who will tend to her earthly possessions to get her relocated to a different apartment and then a nursing home???
We are elderly ourselves with health issues as well and she doesn't seem to understand that we are working at getting our own state of affairs in order. We're working on this. The remodeling and downsizing is a full time job which we are moving incredibly slow on.
Since April, she is a great deal weaker than before due to getting another serious cough. The cough went away, but her strength did not return. Perhaps it will take half a year to get there. Don't know, but I don't believe she should move to a secluded apartment. Her present apartment is such a nice set up for her.
If she moves her residence to a different state, she will have to establish a apartment for half a year or live in a nursing home residence where she pays high rent until her money runs out then she would be turned over to MEDICAID where she is allowed like $60 a month for personal supplies and entertainment. Still she'd need to apply to MEDICAID ahead of time.
With her living already in Kansas, it would be a faster process to go from her apartment into the local nursing home. I'll be visiting with my siblings via letter to let them know my thoughts on this at present instead of talking on the telephone about it.
If she is incapacitated, then we would have to decide as a family the direction we will go. I told Mom, if she falls and hurts herself again, I could not come stay with her because of what we are doing and moving. She continues to go to the Dollar Store to get her milk. She doesn't want to pay $1 to have the milk from the local grocery store deliver it to her home. $1. Instead she puts her self in harms way to save a $1.
Last year, in March 2022, she fell and broke a hip at Dollar General carrying a gallon of milk to her car when she misjudged the distance between the curb and the truck's hood she was reaching for to balance herself and she fell, breaking her hip. She recovered and then a few months later she fell at home after fainting and cracked her pelvis. She recovered and now a year has passed and she will not spend a dollar for milk to be delivered to her apartment. I don't believe this is using good judgment. I need to do this for her.
She cannot move in with us as the COTTAGE is entirely too small plus, God Bless her, she is incredibly OUTSPOKEN and opinionated which would cause tension between my Husband and myself. Physically, I have a bad back and I cannot left her if she would need help getting up.
My siblings and our spouses have health issues as well. So I shall see what their stance is on this and visit with Mom about moving into the nursing home right where she is.
How do I communicate to her that putting this nursing home relocation off will put a burden on her grown children that have health issues as well if she has to go into a home quickly?
Her stubbornness is a challenge.
What would spending a dollar for milk delivery cost her? I will pay for the weekly gallon of milk plus the dollar delivery fee myself then it will cost her nothing.
I am beyond tired.
