THE ANSWER IS YES

AS OF LATE, I AM AWAKE SITTING IN MY CHAIR BEFORE THE DINING ROOM LIGHT CLICKS ON AT 6:15.  It's on a timer.  6:15 comes and like clock work, the light clicks on and shines.  I haven't been sleeping the best since we moved.  It's been three weeks.  The little Victorian bed has a very firm mattress and our two grown bodies aren't use to sleeping so close together as older peeps.  It isn't our Queen size mattress.  

With having three bedroom suites, one had to go into storage.  I wanted to keep the Victorian Bedroom Suite and my Husband's Grandparents Bedroom set which meant I couldn't use the furniture with the Queen size mattress.  I'm not sure I made the right decision.  Truth is, I had been sleeping in a recliner at the main house since 2020 due to having a horrible cold at the start of  the  c o v i d  pandemic.  When I returned to my bed sleeping on the mattress hurt my shoulders and hips so badly that I returned to the recliner.

After a few months, my Husband started sleeping in his recliner so we were together in the same room.  It remained this way until about a month ago when we left the main house and started sleeping at the COTTAGE.  Hoping I adjust may be a pipe dream.  

I believe I will sleep better after the house sells and the responsibility of the main house is no more.  This process between living in the main house to living here in the COTTAGE is full of changes.  Downsizing and having a change of scenery is a huge adjustment.

With THANKSGIVING behind me and CHRISTMAS before me, I have much to think about and do.  The transition from what was to what is takes on a different feel about LIFE.  I am not only working at downsizing our earthly belongings, but I am working at downsizing my huge physical body as well.  I finished DAY ONE of the COLOR WHEEL DIET.  It was trying.  Old habits are hard to break at times.  What I eat is more than what is placed before me.  It's a habit to eat a certain way.  I want sweets and breads.  They call my name in the evenings.  I have got to focus on eating crunchy vegetables in the evening when my BAD HABITS start rearing their ugly heads.  Eat me.  Feed me.  You really want it, don't you?  Am I addicted to certain things?  Have I been programmed to eat unhealthy things?  Yes.  The answer is YES.  I have to retrain myself to say NO.  I don't need that JUNK FOOD.  I don't need to eat.  Drink water and say, NO to eating just because I can.  

Actually, with this COLOR WHEEL DIET I am eliminating certain foods from my daily intake of calories.  It's in restrictive eating that I eliminate the wrong kind of calories.  DAY TWO of the COLOR WHEEL DIET.  Tis YELLOW DAY where I get to eat scrambled eggs for breakfast and corn for lunch.  It seems like when I am restricting my food intact that I think about eating FOOD way too much.  I suppose it is the body's way of protecting itself from starving.  To get my focus off of so much food will help make the dieting easier.  How do I do this?  Controlled thinking. Discipline.  Retraining my thoughts.

MAKING HEALTHIER CHOICES has become easier for me and I do think about what I am eating before I pop it into my mouth.  What is this stuff made up of?  Calories?  Fat?  Carbs?  Is it healthy?  Portions and time of day when I eat is also taken into consideration.  In regards to that, I have made huge progress in the last few years.

With a very slow metabolism, my body is slower than the average bear to burning calories and losing weight.  With no thyroid, my thermometer is broken.  I understand that those with hypothyroidism have more difficulty losing weight and should avoid carbs.  Doesn't seem fair when I love carbs.  If I had to choose between a fresh out of the oven piece of bread to eating a salad, I would choose the bread every time.  If I had to choose between a piece of bread and drinking a soda, I'd pick the bread.  Keep in mind that the wheat of this era is not like in Biblical times.  Our wheat has been altered and is no longer the same as it were.  Man has done a number on wheat.  

By embracing healthy fruits and vegetables and looking at the bigger picture, I can select to not eat foods higher in carbs.  Encourage myself with veggies which has far less carbs than grains and highly processed foods full of carbs, sugars, chemical additives and fats. 

NOW, with having my ovaries removed, I understand that weight gain is common.  I kind of knew that. Taking certain medicines can cause weight gain.  Being Insulin and Lipid resistant can cause weight gain as can being Type 2 diabetic.  I'm not real happy about this.  Not only does OVER EATING and not burning the calories off cause weight gain, but so do a multitude of other factors.  Hormones and chemicals for weight gain are fed to the animals we eat for foods causing us to gain weight as well.     

Eating vegetables, drinking water and exercising is the tough pill I must swallow in life.  I have to overcome this obesity.  I don't want to be obese all the days of my LIFE especially as a older woman.  Over time being too heavy contributes to unwanted health issue.  I truly believe this.

Yes, I was one of those people that wanted to believe that being heavy was alright.  Couldn't be helped.  I made excuses as to why I could eat the way I wanted and could get away with drinking diet pop and not exercising.  I truly was.  Now I have embraced the truth that being obese is unhealthy and adds to health problems.  I truly believe this, but I also believe that being skinny can be unhealthy as well.  The quality of our food matters.  NO MATTER WHAT SIZE ONE IS, the quality of what we eat, when we eat and how much we eat, matters.   

I know I was not alone about believing that obesity is alright when I read article after article and heard that big is beautiful as a woman.  The untruth that being FAT is alright and that FAT is beautiful, rings in many a ear.  Accept me as I am an oversized lady.  PLUS SIZE ME. TRUTH IS it isn't alright to be obese and it takes special attention to deal with it.  I know that just because one is so called normal in their appearance does not mean they have their act altogether either, but the fact that they weigh less and fall into a range that is more acceptable on the medical charts is far better than being too heavy which causes additional problems.  My goal weight is a ways off, but I see light at the end of the tunnel and having a OH WELL ATTITUDE doesn't belong in my vocabulary.  

I have to know what added chemicals are in the food I eat.  Is it really even food?  If the food I'm eating has come from a lab and I eat it, I'm part of the lab experiment.  I AM NOW A LAB RAT and the so called experts like that.  I become a statistic.  A number in a report.  I am one of those that is manipulated and controlled in the scheme of things.  

When the truth comes out about chemical additives being in foods and it's GMO engineered, these foods are being pushed on you and red flags should go up.  If you are fooled into believing that this is alright, you'll encounter an unhealthy body where emotional disturbances take place. Mental health issues arise as well.  Poor choices become the norm and you may not know it is even taking place.  A sound mind and body are affected when eating FAKE FOOD that's been created to destroy your well being.  Your very existence is being challenged by a higher hierarchy in human society that believes you are expendable and they want to depopulate the world to make the planet more self sustaining with you out of the picture.  Sounds weird, YES?  Yes, but it is the way of the world and the reality of eating fake food is on the agenda to make room for the elite that believe they are gods and you are an unimportant carbon print taking up space and using resources they want for themselves.  You are a worker bee for them and they own you. They think they can do what ever they want to you and get what the results they want. Conspiracy theory?  No.  It's a reality when you read between the lines and figure out what two plus two is. 

Just because there is an abundance of food to eat does not mean it is the right kind of fuel to eat.  That's where MINDFUL EATING needs to kick in and help you process what you are eating.  Why are you eating that? Why?  Because you have to eat and it's what's before you?  It's what you can get your hands on.  It's cheaper to buy?  

A lot of times I thought what I was eating was considered being a part of a balanced meal. I believed I was doing the right thing to be healthy.  It was what I was taught and educated about. I had no idea I was being misled until recently.  Ignorance is not bliss.  It's ignorance.    

It wasn't simply that I overate and was a slob.  What I ate mattered a great deal.  Being active matters.  Resting matters.  Lower stress levels matter.  Being organized and staying tidy matters. How much I eat and what I eat, matters.  Time of day I eat, matters.  Why I eat MATTERS. What's in the food and if it's actually food, matters.  

If I eat what I think is healthy for me and it isn't then I have a problem, don't I?  Many have problems. It isn't just about how much you are eating, it's what you're eating.     

Eating vegetables has taken some training and rethinking what and when to eat.  I got use to intermittent fasting this last year and yet, it didn't seem to work well at losing weight.  Not for me.  I know I have to CUT THE CALORIES BIG TIME.   If I give the intermittent fasting more time it might eventually help.  I seem to take longer at everything to get the same results as others.  Slow metabolism.  Very slow.  If I eat more vegetables and pay attention to the time of day I eat, eating within an 8 hour window of time each day, it might assist me in reducing.  Shall see.  

When I diet and calories are burning up in my body, I can actually tell that something is happening in my body.  It's uncomfortable, but doable.  I can tell.  This should be good news, but I have a tendency to not like the sensation I am feeling.  It isn't a comforting feeling.  If it's what it takes to thin down, I best let this take place in my temple.

Be selective in what I buy to eat.  Keep in remembrance that not all food is created equal and it matters what I eat.  Eat a variety of different colored foods avoiding highly processed foods and make sure it was grown in healthy soil.  This is a new one to take in.

Nutrient rich soil.  Where do I find this kind of food if I don't grow it myself?  Must I completely change everything about eating?  The answer is YES.

MINDFUL EATING requires an education that may not get me a diploma made out of sheep's skin, but it will assist me in having a healthier physical LIFE.   The answer is YES, I will practice MINDFUL EATING.

~d